nobody said it was easy, nobody ever said it would be this hard.

Sorry I'm not doing so well keeping this updated; I've been very busy lately. I'm trying to overcome this bulimia. I want to shrink my stomach. This morning I ate ten eggs, six pieces of toast, yet I was still hungry. That's not right. So I'm watching some thinspo's on youtube - they really help! Here's one that I'm especially in love with right now :
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4Hs4YhmyN4

:) Beautiful music, beautiful pictures.
Yesterday i had a doctor's appointment. I layered up the best I could (although it was 90 degrees!) and I filled up on water making myself 121. I was 124 last time I had to go which was about three weeks ago, and the doctor and my mom were flipping out about my weight loss. Thank God they don't know how much I really weigh. (114) But all that water never fully came outta me, so I'm up to 115 again. :(
Hopefully by tomorrow I can be 114 and 113 again. My mom has to work four the next four days so I'll be able to get away with it. And then Monday I have to go back to the doctors just for another blood test. I had to get blood drawn yesterday and I passed out. Not from the sight of it, just from the feeling that I got afterwards. I was so dizzy it was terrible. But I was fine within ten minutes.
Ahh, so I really like the people who comment on my blogs. :) thankss!
If you want my facebook or myspace, I'll give it to youuus so we can talk more.
I'm gonna get off for the day, maybe bleach my hair somemore haha. :)